So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
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