i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
