my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
he wants to bone in the snuggie
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Randomize
