just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
Randomize
