On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
