rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize