Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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