Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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