Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Floor bacon is actually really good
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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