I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
My vagina is officially offended.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
