i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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