How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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