Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
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