At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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