In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
my poor anus
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
