"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
