Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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