Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
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