it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
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