I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Randomize
