I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
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