Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Randomize
