Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
