Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
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