I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
