I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
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