"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
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