her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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