plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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