Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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