I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
