Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Randomize
