So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
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