Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
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