I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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