Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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