tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I need to calm my uterus...
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