But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
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