It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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