highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Randomize
