I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
