Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
