Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
