from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
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