The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
