i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
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