Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical�
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
Randomize
