i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
