Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
