What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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